Why is it that I seem to think of the most creative blog posts during the most impossible moments? Driving down the pass, in the shower, or when I'm so tired and desperate for sleep for instance. I always think that I will remember when I sit at the computer. And now, I am here. Where are all those brilliant ideas now?

It's no wonder, however. I have not had more than a 2 hour stretch of sleep at a time in months. I actually consider a 2 hour stretch doing well, if that is any indication of my situation. I think I heard somewhere that it's the deep sleep that you enter during that 4-5 hour stretch of sleep, that "reboots" your creativity and ability to retain and learn. Now, mind you, I could be feeding you a load of B.S. this very moment...so before you go quoting me, please look it up yourself. I obviously do not have the brain capacity to do so myself. Anyway, what I'm trying to say is that I'm all out of brain power.

I'm confident that I will get it back. This is not a permanent. Just like all things in life, it will change. As confident as I am that I will recover from my sleep deprivation, I do recognize that just as things will change, things do not necessarily get better. I'm not even going to expand that thought. Let  that one go. I am superstitious in that sense. "Bad" things, let's not even think about it. "Good" things... let's daydream on that!

Speaking of daydreaming...I have had the ability to do that a lot. I think that sleep deprivation has some enhancing qualities to the ability to day dream.... ahhhh, the beach house daydream. The sound of the waves crashing...all. night. long. So loud you can hear them over the sound of the t.v. show  you are watching. It's no use, just turn it off and listen to the crashing sound. Liquid, alive, energizing. Hear it in your night dreams.  Hear it so long that you stop hearing it at all and all you can do is see it.  It's intensity brings peace. Submission.

I went to Flickr Commons to find a photo for this blog post. I found one all right.  One I wish I hadn't found. This one:

OK, did you get a good look at that? Yeah...cringe.

Occasionally I see the men in the big trucks with the big animal in the back. The big, DEAD, animal. After all, I do live in the mountains. I live where these animals live. "These animals," these deer, bear, elk, cougar, rabbits, coyotes. These animals. These animals that are so vital to "these peoples" existence. I wonder how "these people" would react if I came to their neighborhoods and started shooting their landscaping, their veggie gardens, their rose bushes...

After all, plants are vital to my existence.